My Real Bio

image.jpg

We often say what people want to hear. A brilliant offered me the challenge of writing me. All of me.

Like (probably?) everyone, I am a yin yang of forces that are very disorienting. 

And, when I own them, sparkling, golden, beautiful.

I crave lemony green ginger juice. It makes me feel alive. Cinnamon toast with lots of butter is my heroin. I profoundly enjoy (and feel deep shame about) perfectly toasted, glittering-with-sugar, or glistening-with-honey, super buttery cinnamon toast. 

I am often astonished at my overflowing compassion and my self-centered ambitions. 

As a little girl I felt at home hiking in the Colorado Rocky Mountains and I drifted away at night reminiscing about my mermaid life at sea. 

I own my fierce independence. I am a righteous babe. I am able, confident, and all five feet of me loves of loading all ten feet of my paddle board on my little mini car. All by myself. I am terrified that I will end up alone. A small push, and feel totally insecure. And, all of 100% me misses my last love. Deeply. 

There are few things I enjoy more than minimalist camping, cut up shins after mountain-biking, public transportation, walking barefoot down dirt roads, cheap Mexican food, and large thrift stores. Except maybe fresh, lavender-scented, high-thread-count pillowcases, in a beautifully wallpapered boutique hotel, after a hand-crafted pomelo sage cocktail. With large ice cubes.

I am extremely loving, safe, forgiving, and compassionate with almost everyone I know.

I try hard to love on myself. 

I love close community, I love my tight, loving family, I cherish rich roots, a sense of belonging, the familiarity of a place and its plants after years of friendship, seeing faces I know around the next corner, and stable love. I long to get lost in the world, stargaze from another hemisphere, board the wrong train and end up at the perfect trailhead. I yearn to voyage, untethered, chosen by unknown adventures, swallowed whole by Life. I want to run with eyes wide open, choose from grocery labels in languages I can't read, with radical freedom, surprised, stoked, at home in myself, lost at sea.